Say Hi To Your Mom simultaneously defies and enforces physics. We're the mumbling in your head while you're crunching the numbers. We're the apparitions, ticks, gut wrenching, suspicion and glee too. We're the reason you rolled a nineteen for charisma, the cat's meow, your least favorite aunt. Touch us and we'll touch you. Watch us and we'll watch you. You once tried to call us and the line was busy, but that was actually just us making busy signal noises with our mouths. If you would have called back we would have cooked you some pasta. What you're looking for right now is going to evade you forever. Fish don't speak but squirrels do. It all depends on your longitude. You should start from the beginning, but ignore the prequels. We like minimalism, broken robots, granny smith apples, sneakers and the mundane. We like make believe vampires but the real ones scare us. We don't care too much for your boss and the fact that you're starting to resemble her. You should work on that. You'll find us to be very reasonable if you'd just give us a chance. You can paint us by numbers. You can tell us to your shrink. You can consume us up to three times daily but you shouldn't ever exceed twelve doses in a four day period, unless you have a note from your mother. We definitely detest mom jokes. Seriously. We don't need to be reminded of what we resemble. We named ourselves after Midwestern dairy queen civility. We usually involve a variety of livestock running rampantly around. We think sideways motorcycle helmets are all the rage now that sideways trucker's hats are out. We are live, fleshy human beings attempting to recreate these sounds in real life. We put out our own records. We speak in binary code. We're in the market for an A-team van. We strive for muzak and custom made slip n' slides. We write under pseudonyms. We play for keeps. Our grass is always greenest. Our hair is unkempt.